Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Citigroup dupes the taxpayers again.

Once again taxpayers of America, you have been duped. Just 11 days after reaching a deal with the United States Government to receive $25 billion dollars to stay afloat, on top of the $40B and $20B they have previously received, released a report today saying that they are so far having a very profitable 2009.

They somehow remain profitable even while donating huge wads to Obama's inauguration and building that new stadium of theirs, oh it must be the $85B of taxpayer money that gives them that extra bounce.

I think Becky C. from Just A Girl In Short Shorts says it best:

Maybe some smarty pants MBA can help me out? But preferably not one of those guys who pretends to understand those gee whiz Weapons of Financial Destruction known as derivatives.

Last week that day finally arrived when you could buy a share of Citigroup at the Dollar Store. And in the pattern that has become familiar, the bank gave a call to the Treasury and Ben Bernake?with the message dreaded by all parents who have a squirt in one of our over priced institutions of higher learning?SEND MONEY.

And of course, the enablers took Citigroup's dire warning to heart,and agreed to a preferred stock swap deal that would infuse an additional twenty-five billion into the bank.

Today, astonishingly, investors are going nuts bulling up the market?all on news that Citigroup claims to have had the most profitable two months since 2007.

I am afraid I am one of those cheeky girls who is not afraid to ask a dumb question?just like I never cared about looking stupid when I asked my financial guru how all the novel exotic financial instruments of the derivative class really worked. Of course, I no longer feel stupid, since it turns out that no one, with the possible exception of Diane Garnick, has a clue.

Call be a dumb blond or a cynical bitch, but this Citigroup is one slippery character.

Back in October, when Wachovia bit the dust, the FDIC brokered a sweetheart deal with Wells Fargo to take possession.

Next thing we know Citibank makes a very generous competing offer?and is even threatening a hostile takeover?with lawsuits and everything. In the end they were persuaded to quit acting like a brat.

But then something happened, that as far as I know, only astounded me.

Four weeks later the hotshot Citibank raiders went crying to the Fed for a bailout to the tune of approximately$300 billion--all depending on how you do the math.

Just yesterday federal regulators reported that Citi, along with B of A, JP Morgan, HSBC, and Wells Fargo face huge losses.

But who wants to believe that?after all its been over a week since Citi was nosing up to the public trough.

The chairman of Citi today issued the patently absurd report on their recent profits. Perhaps he was huffing glue, but the investors on Wall Street responded like they just snorted a pile of righteous blow.

Today the bad boy of the financial world is soaring high. But why shouldn't they be? Bernanke finally said it?none of the big banks are going to be allowed to fail?no matter how much money the Fed has to print.

What could be finer than being a shareholder in that scam?

That is until the world finally wakes up, and discovers that just like Citi, Ben's dollars ain't worth shit.

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